Determined

My last baby is 2 weeks old and I'm so sad!  His umbilical stump came off yesterday and his circumcision (sorry if this is tmi) ring came off today.  I cannot believe this is going by so fast.  I mean, yes, I realize he's only 2 weeks old not 20 years old, but it's going by too fast for me.  I am enjoying mothering Ezra so much and I think it has to do with my state of mind.  He's my last baby.  This is the very last time I'm going to get to hold and snuggle one of my brand new babies for as long as I want in the middle of the night.

Something is so different about me this time around.  I think with Kennin I was in freak out mode.  I was a 20 year old new mother and I had such high levels of anxiety about taking care of her, taking her places, if I was screwing her up, and I was pretty much doing it all on my own.  With Grayson I was in survival mode.  I was taking care of my 3 year old daughter who was dealing with the loss of her dad moving away, surviving one feeding and diaper change at a time, and I was doing it alone.  This is not to say that I don't have fond, loving memories of taking care of newborn Kennin and Gray, but I'm savoring taking care of this little boy, Ezra.

My super sweet 2 week old

And my latest obsession... his fuzzy ears!